I LOVE GLITTER!

It's true.  I do.  It all started when I wanted to wear some gold glittered shoes for the Lady Gaga concert.  I found some lovely platform heels in a lovely shade of glittered gold.  Unfortunately, those shoes were $150 dollars.  Bastards.  I decided I could probably make some for at least $130 less than that.  So, my search began for some cheap ass high heels.  My non-prayers were answered when I walked into the Spirit Halloween store the day after Halloween.  I found some platform in a hideous patent faux leather white.  At $15 it was like at first site.  I snatched them up and shortly thereafter purchased some gold spray paint and gold glitter.  This is what happened next:

 

After three or four glitter applications, they were ready to take out in public.

Note Natalie's amazing home-made feather shoes to the right

After that I had a pretty intense obsession with spray-painting things gold.  I attacked a lamp, candle holders, a cardboard deer head, some trays, my fingernails, a box, the garbage can (somebody had stolen our last one so I painted our address on it), and a picture frame.  Then I ran out of spray-paint, and my rampage ended.

I made this two-toned glitter headband with some rubbery pieces of glitter paper. 

Hand's off; they're both taken.  Only one by me.

I eventually found a project that called for me to replenish my gold spray-paint: a Gold/Glitter Disco Ball! (I didn't think of it on my own.  I'm not that creative; I found it on Pinterest.) There are two reasons why it appears I went a little lite on the glitter: First, I ran out of glitter.  Second, I believed some packing tape would securely hold the orb to the ceiling.  I was wrong.  It fell, and our living room was glitter-bombed.  I actually didn't vacuum up the glitter after it happened.  Two reasons:  First, I've already told you I'm lazy.  Second, it was our NYE party and I felt it made things more festive.

I was pretty sad when I ran out of glitter, but I didn't run straight to the store to replenish because...I'm lazy.  Also, I kept telling myself that I was going to print those 40% off coupons, and then I never did, and then I never went because I didn't want to pay full price.

While I remained gold glitter-free for a month or so, I curbed my glitter needs with these:

We all lived happy together until I realized I couldn't paint an entire pair of shoes with one tiny bottle.  See...months before I had ruined a perfectly cute pair of nude booties by dropping my black liquid eyeliner on them.  Instead of trying to wipe it off with water, I immediately applied an oily make-up remover to the faux leather.  It didn't take too well, and there was no going back.  I am too cheap to just throw a pair of shoes away that I had only worn once... so I tried to upcycle them into a new color.  I chose blue...solely because that is the color of hair dye I had on hand.  I was dreaming of a deep rich royal blue.  Instead, this is what happened:

 I applied somewhere around three coats and it never got better than this.  :(  I decided to branch out from gold and try black on for a change.  After applying two coats of glue/glitter, I realized I probably ought to have spray-painted them black before I started the glitter application.  No worries, I just sprayed right over the glitter.  That's how lazy people roll.

Then I brushed on one more coat of glue and dumped a bunch of glitter on top.

Me thinks a definite improvement over what I had to start with. I'm pretty happy with how they turned out.  Now I just need to make some friends or get some sort of social life so I can take them off the shelf and out on the town.  Immediately after setting my eyes on these beauties I began looking around furiously to find other things to douse in black glitter goodness.  I searched high and low but couldn't find anything worthy.  Thankfully, BW came home and suggested I revisit the gold dear-head I had previously sprayed gold.  I had already painted the base brown...but wasn't feeling it.  It was a perfect specimen to bask in the glory of all that black glitter has to offer.  

 After I saw how fantastic non-gold glitter could be I hot-footed it right back to the craft store to broaden my glitter awareness.  I came back with this:

Gold, fine gold, black, more black, and brown.  Oh and red glitter-glue.  It wasn't my first choice, but all the red glitter was out...I wish I had never purchased it.  And I'll tell you why.  I want to be able to apply as much glitter as my heart desires to any given surface.  With glitter glue you apply a coat.  Wait for it to dry.  Apply another coat.  Wait for it to dry.  Become incredibly dissatisfied with the amount of glitter on surface.  Cry.  

My plan was to take this print I had purchased for myself on my birthday and turn it up a notch.

I really wanted to just throw glitter all over it.  But I told myself, "show some restraint, woman," and I decided to do something a little more subtle. Enter that shitty glitter glue.  After two coats I was left with this:

Don't tell a difference?  Let me zoom in.  

I hate you red-glitter glue.  You are stupid and barely affect anything you touch.  

I decided it was time to put the painting aside and move on to something else.  Specifically, it was time to get back to where it all started: gold glitter.  I found a couple of things I found that would be bettered with a coat or ten of glitter: some wooden hearts and a pair of red shoes.  

yes those are framed paper dolls. deal with it.

Isn't life better with glitter?  Yes.  It is.  

Then I decided to show some glitter glove to Dwight Schrute. 
 

He's been a constant desk companion for many years and was ready for a makeover.  A glitter makeover. 

He's feeling more confident already. 

After my successes I headed back to the craft store today in search of red (non-glue) glitter.  I found it.  And then some; I found a 30-pack of every color I never knew I needed, but realized I couldn't live without. 

Luckily, two of them were red.  I picked it up and never looked back.  I also found something for Pootie. 

 I keep seeing all these nurseries with the baby's name above the crib.  I guess so it won't ever forget who it is.  idk.  Point is...Pootie never had her own nursery or crib, but she has her own bed... so I figured her bed area could use some personalizing so she wouldn't ever be confused about who she is or where she is supposed to sleep.  She seems pretty happy with it. 

And they came pre-glittered.

It was clearly meant to be.

I have a lot of plans for my new glitter collection.  It mostly starts and stops with using it on my fingernails...but I'm sure I'll think of other things.  Or more likely: I'll find something that somebody else did with glitter on Pinterest and then copy it.

Time to hot orange glitter my nails!